One last stream of consciousness
I am ending 2005 with a final stream of consciousness post, which I hope captures a few useful thoughts and reflections on the year just ending. Here goes, in no particular order or sequence.
First, tonight, December 31 is what some of us call 'amateur night'. For those of us who once imbibed professionally but now are bystanders, you know what I mean. I hope everyone out there has a safe and enjoyable holiday. For me the holidays won't officially be over until Notre Dame plays (and beats) Ohio State on Monday. Go Irish! (Image from Michigan vs N.D. at the "Big House" - this past September.)
2005 was year of personal lows followed personal highs. It is ending on a good note - I don't think I've ever been more content, or felt so good about the future. The point is that I have no damn idea what tomorrow will bring and finally I'm okay with that. I have, all my life, tried to control outcomes. It just doesn't work. Its not that I don't give a flying f**k about tomorrow, but I've got to show up, do my part, and let it happen as its supposed to, and accept that.
2005 could have been viewed a terrrible year career-wise, although there does seem to be a positive gradient happening at the tail end. I really thought Grid-building would be simpler, easier, and more satisfying than it has been. How naiive! Okay - nothing worthwhile is going to be easy, and we're gonna build something really sharp in 2006!
I am very happy to be living in the wonderful city of Chicago. Since I re-started my running career in Ferney-Voltairre, I had the opportunity to run in the "world's greatest gym" (I took that line from a friend of mine who has taken many a run down the lakefront while training for marathons). There is nothing more inspiring than a turn around the bend to see a stunning skyline which to me signals so many other inspirations and dreams of the people who built this fabulous place.
Of course more than the place are the people I know here - at work, and in the city. I happen to have a particular set of avocations that put me into contact with people all over this city, and I've been blessed to know them. Though
I am not a native Chicagoan and who knows whether I'll be here on a long term basis, I value my time spent here so far, and have no plans to move (for once!).
And I am very grateful to have one of the world's coolest jobs, at one of the world's coolest universities. I am very well paid for playing all day with any number of computing technologies, and all for
the purpose of investigating fundamental physics, like what is nature of reality afterall (yeah I'm reading Brian Greene too, what a good way to get another perspective on what I'm doing...nice to look up from the trench from time to time).
And I get to travel the world for free to do it. This year I've been to Geneva a couple of times, Como Italy, Paris. I get the opportunity to help others get done what they need to do to be production and contribute, which might be my best contribution. When, in history, have people been so privileged?
This year has seen relationships beginning, ending, continuing, continuing in different ways, unexpected ways, new ways. How cool it is to be participating in the work of the planet.
Now I'm off to celebrate a little, and bring in 2006 happy and free.

