I hate turbulence in airplanes. A couple of good bumps and I can't concentrate; I have to give up working and watch the movie or listen to music or stare out the window (which, odly, calms me). One of the inane fears is that the plane will shake itself to bits -- so I found the following quote from an article in the NYTimes amusing:
Probably the most unnerving announcement I ever heard came three days after 9/11 on a Delta flight. "I'm Captain Bill and I'm telling you all right now, if you see anything out of the ordinary, or you see anyone near the cockpit, you're going to tackle them," the voice said. "And keep your seat belts fastened tight, because if anything funny goes on, I'm going to throw this plane around in the sky so fiercely that whoever is standing up, bad or good, they're going to be bounced around to the point of incapacitation." That got everybody's attention.